Students are always providing excuses as to why they can’t… something.
I’m proud to announce a fine new entry into the competition in the ‘Best Original Excuse Delivery Method in an Advanced Photography Class’ category!
This is truly an exciting item in the running for the academic award. (see below)
Creativity is often very uneven, so when it comes right down to critiquing the entries to the Unofficial Student Hall of Fame keeping a truly dispassionate mind is sometimes a burden. It is, however, an additional educator burden that I’m willing to shoulder.
Examples of common entries in the ‘General Excuse’ Category include (but aren’t limited to):
- Hand in the assignment because ______________
- Come to class because _____________________
- Answer the question because ________________
- Stop texting during class because _____________
- Keep awake in class because _________________
Some the reasons (I use the term ‘reason’ as loosely here as students do) may go from the mundane to the sublime:
- My puppy ate…
- The assignment (15 entries to date)
- My film (11 entries to date)
- My camera (3 entries to date)
- My roommate…
- Lost it (7 entries to date)
- Spilled beer on It (4 entries to date)
- Had this girl over and she must have taken it (2 entries to date)
- Stole my camera (3 entries to date)
- My assignment…
- Fell in the pool/river/lake/toilet (9 entries to date)
- Was confiscated by the police (1 entry to date)
- Wasn’t so good (27 entries to date)
- I was late because…
- My girlfriend’s car got a flat (2 entries to date)
- I had to take my dog/cat/fish/hamster/snake/kid brother to the vet/doctor/jail (15 entries to date)
- I killed a frog with my bicycle and had to bury it (1 entry to date)
- I forgot what time the class started (too many entries to count)
- I forgot where the classroom was (2 entries to date)
- I was spaced out (6 entries to date)
- I won’t be in class because…
- There’s this band that’s playing (16 entries to date)
- My boyfriend’s band is playing (4 entries to date)
- It’s my boyfriend’s day off (5 entries to date)
- My grandmother died (11 entries to date)
- My other grandmother died too (3 entries to date)
- It’s my birthday (11 entries to date)
And now, I’m proud to introduce, a fine new entry in the:
‘Best Original Excuse Delivery Method in an Advanced Photography Class’ category
This is so good an entry that it almost calls out for a new sub-category, ‘Best Drunk-Writing Excuse Note’.
The setup: Kelci was late to class because her mother was having a birthday (“not so unusual”, you say?). This entry is elevated above the average excuse note because her mother Kae drunk-wrote it (like drunk-dialing, or drunk-texting) on a bar cocktail napkin.
Now, I have been the recipient of occasional notes on bar napkins (haven’t we all?) But I have never, before this, received a student excuse note on one, let alone a drunk-written one. There is even an ‘in-the-note’ disclaimer as to why the center was left otherwise blank.
May I have the napkin, please?
– – – –